There is a reason to why I don't like watching romantic movies... I always end up extremely depressed. Movie love is always so amazing, well usually I suppose.
I've seen Twilight twice... and for someone who scoffed the movie and book from the first time she heard about, its a lot. Twice! I completely underestimated its hold on me. I've always loved the vampire ideal thanks to my high school goth days. And the story is great.
I guess I've always just dreamed of an amazing true love story, especially one that will last for eternity. I'm your usual American girl in that aspect.
Where is the love of my life? I just hope he's worth waiting for... if he's out there.
11.29.2008
11.25.2008
11.23.2008
My life
is shit.
Idk why.
I feel like shit, physically and mentally. So nauseous. I wish I was nauseous due to pregnancy... but its not.
Ugh. I wanted to be optimistic but I suck right now.
Oh... I have a job interview in the morning at Barnes and Noble bookstore. I hope its not just for to be the buy back people.
Idk why.
I feel like shit, physically and mentally. So nauseous. I wish I was nauseous due to pregnancy... but its not.
Ugh. I wanted to be optimistic but I suck right now.
Oh... I have a job interview in the morning at Barnes and Noble bookstore. I hope its not just for to be the buy back people.
11.21.2008
Its been a while
I guess I hadn't really felt much like blogging, plus the last month has been hectic and insane. I've been out of town every weekend since the 24th... That's four weekends in a row, and this weekend I am headed to Corpus Christi to hang out with Hillary.
Its been fun... I've been to Houston, then San Antonio twice, then Houston again this past weekend, and to Corpus Christi tonight. I wish I could have gone further out though... maybe out of state. Maybe this Christmas break, if I don't find a job, I'll head out to Chicago with my uncle, or just somewhere... even if its by myself.
I suppose I just like to get away from this town. I wonder how different life would have been if Rudy and I had moved to Arlington, if things hadn't gone awry this summer. I still think about him. I still think about how doing things differently could have prevented him from coming down, leading to his demise. My mom and I could have gone up that weekend to drop off his car, but I wanted to go to a show in Dallas the week after so I didn't want to go. Its ridiculous. Its ridiculous how little decisions can totally change the direction of your life.
Now all I want to do is sleep. I don't want to think, just sleep.
Its been fun... I've been to Houston, then San Antonio twice, then Houston again this past weekend, and to Corpus Christi tonight. I wish I could have gone further out though... maybe out of state. Maybe this Christmas break, if I don't find a job, I'll head out to Chicago with my uncle, or just somewhere... even if its by myself.
I suppose I just like to get away from this town. I wonder how different life would have been if Rudy and I had moved to Arlington, if things hadn't gone awry this summer. I still think about him. I still think about how doing things differently could have prevented him from coming down, leading to his demise. My mom and I could have gone up that weekend to drop off his car, but I wanted to go to a show in Dallas the week after so I didn't want to go. Its ridiculous. Its ridiculous how little decisions can totally change the direction of your life.
Now all I want to do is sleep. I don't want to think, just sleep.
11.05.2008
Is this history?
Well of course this is history, every passing day is history. But we are now part of United States presidential history. In a few months, America will have its first Black (really interracial) president.
Should be interesting. Though I voted for McCain, I don't think things will be that bad with Obama. I think I could have gone either way. I was undecided until I went to the polling place and decided on McCain, primarily because McCain and Palin are wise with money.
Well... here's to a history being made!
I hope all ends well.
Should be interesting. Though I voted for McCain, I don't think things will be that bad with Obama. I think I could have gone either way. I was undecided until I went to the polling place and decided on McCain, primarily because McCain and Palin are wise with money.
Well... here's to a history being made!
I hope all ends well.
10.30.2008
DI NO AL HALLOWEEN
I don't understand why people could hate Halloween so much! Its so fun! Its great!
This year, I'm going up to San Antonio for the Halloween weekend. I'll get to see my lovely Alex! I miss him! And I'll get to hang out with Sammy, my awesome cousin!
The Houston trip was amazing! Definitely very, very fun.
Random thoughts:
Its strange that so many people that I knew as a teenager who were Christian have changed very much. I remember when everyone very religious. I don't think it was necessarily their fault, we just believed what we were told by the authority figures. But things change, people change, and I hope/think we're all the better for those changes.
I wish I had never known that side of Christianity, but its something that is part of my history and has made me who I am now. I hated that period of my life. I absolutely abhorred it. I remember all the bullshit I was fed. I remember the bullshit emotional situations I was placed in. I thank God that its not like that in my life anymore. I thank God for truth.
Though I miss belonging to a church, I may still be scarred with all that happened then. Afraid of the abuse of authority and the loveless relationships. Afraid of never being good enough or measuring up to standards.
It wasn't all bad though. Don't get me wrong, there are many moments I cherish, and many lessons I learned. I guess I just didn't agree with some of what was taught, and the way it was handled.
I want to find a church, but I have no desire to go out and look.
I love the Wilhite meetings, but I still desire something more.
I have lovely, amazing close friends right now. And I love them and cherish them. Maybe that's all I really need.
Though I still want something more.
I don't know what it is.
Well... maybe I do know.
This year, I'm going up to San Antonio for the Halloween weekend. I'll get to see my lovely Alex! I miss him! And I'll get to hang out with Sammy, my awesome cousin!
The Houston trip was amazing! Definitely very, very fun.
Random thoughts:
Its strange that so many people that I knew as a teenager who were Christian have changed very much. I remember when everyone very religious. I don't think it was necessarily their fault, we just believed what we were told by the authority figures. But things change, people change, and I hope/think we're all the better for those changes.
I wish I had never known that side of Christianity, but its something that is part of my history and has made me who I am now. I hated that period of my life. I absolutely abhorred it. I remember all the bullshit I was fed. I remember the bullshit emotional situations I was placed in. I thank God that its not like that in my life anymore. I thank God for truth.
Though I miss belonging to a church, I may still be scarred with all that happened then. Afraid of the abuse of authority and the loveless relationships. Afraid of never being good enough or measuring up to standards.
It wasn't all bad though. Don't get me wrong, there are many moments I cherish, and many lessons I learned. I guess I just didn't agree with some of what was taught, and the way it was handled.
I want to find a church, but I have no desire to go out and look.
I love the Wilhite meetings, but I still desire something more.
I have lovely, amazing close friends right now. And I love them and cherish them. Maybe that's all I really need.
Though I still want something more.
I don't know what it is.
Well... maybe I do know.
10.24.2008
Future Glasses...
These are my future glasses. I purchased them earlier at Eyemaster's. I won't get them until sometime next week.
I think they're lovely.
In other news, I've purchased my photography supplies (FINALLY)! I've also purchased some theater make-up to use.
In other other news, I don't know if I'm going to make this blog private or not. I guess I'll decide later.
In a few hours, about 6, I'll be heading to Houston to a Renaissance Faire! Awesome! It should be fun. I am heading out with Anna, Erika and Desiree. Should be great, but then again, I'm extremely emotional lately so I hope I don't become a sourpuss.
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